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这是一个笑话英语翻译

作者:高级段子手发布时间:2019年12月06日 12:19:19分类:英语笑话浏览:38评论:0


导读:
1、

One day, the teacher inquired of Peter: "How much is four minus four?" Peter was tongue-tied.
The teacher got angry and said: "What a fool! You see, if I put four coins in your pocket, but there is a hole in your pocket and all of them leak out, now what is left in your pocket?"
"The hole," replied Peter。

一天,老师问彼得:“4减4等于几?”彼得张口结舌答不上来。
老师生气地说:“真笨!你想,我要是往你口袋里放四个硬币,而你的口袋上有个窟窿,硬币全漏掉了,那么,你衣袋里还剩下什么?”
“窟窿,”彼得答道。 


2、

"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles.

 "When I say, ‘Good afternoon,‘ the undergraduates respond, ‘Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."

“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来,”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。

“我说‘下午好’,本科生们回答说‘下午好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”


3、

Sir William Thompson was very deaf but he did not like people to know this. One evening he had invited several friendsto dinner, and while they were sitting at the table, one of thefriends told a funny story. Everyone laughed, and SirWilliam, who had laughed as loud as anyone, said,“That was a very funny joke, but I know a funnier one. Would you liketo hear it?” They all said they would, so Sir William began hisstory. When it ended, everyone laughed louder than ever andSir William smiled happily. But he didn‘t know the reason for their laughter. He had told the very same story that his friendhad just told.

威廉·汤普森爵士非常聋,但他却不愿意让别人知道这 件事,一天晚上,他邀请了几位朋友吃饭。在就餐的时候,一 位朋友讲了个有趣的故事,大都笑了,汤普森也和别人一 样放声大笑,他说:“这是个十分有趣的笑话,但是我还知道 一个更有趣的笑话,你们愿意听吗?”朋友们都说愿意听。于 是,汤普森开始讲他的故事。当故事讲完时,大家笑得比方才 还厉害,汤普森的脸上露出了欣慰的笑容。但他却不知道别 人发笑的原因。原来,他讲的正是方才那位朋友讲的故事。


4、

Correct
  Teacher: Jimmy, what are the three words which pupils use most often at school?
  Jimmy: I don’t know...
  Teacher: Correct.

很对
  教师:吉米,学生在学校里经常用的三个字是什么?
  吉米:不知道……
  老师:很对。

Notes:
make use of利用,使用
of use有用
out of use不再使用了
use up用完,用光


5、

Teacher: Why do we sometimes call the Middle Ages the Dark Ages?
Betty: Because they had so many knights.

老师:为什么有时我们称中世纪为黑暗时代呢?
贝蒂:因为那时有许多骑士。


6、

A friend of mine was giving an English lesson to a class of adult who had recently come to live in the United States.

After placing quite a number of everyday objects on a table, he asked various members of the class to give him the ruler, the book, the pen and so on. The class went very smoothly and the students seemed interested and serious about the work that they were engaged in until when my friend turned to an Italian student and said, "Give me the keys."

The man looked surprised and somewhat at a loss. Seeing this, my friend thought that the student hadn‘t heard him clearly, so he repeated. "Give me the keys." The Italian shrugged his shoulders. Then, he threw his arms around the teacher‘s neck and kissed him on both cheeks.

我的一位朋友在给一个成人学生班级上英语课。他们都是新近来美国生活的。

在一张桌子上摆了许多日常用品之后,他请全班同学给他挑出尺子,书本,钢笔等。课进行得井然有序,学生们对自己所做的似乎很感兴趣,也很认真。后来轮到一名来自意大利的学生,我的朋友说:“给我钥匙。”

那人看起来非常吃惊,也有点手足无措。看到这种情况,我的朋友想是他没有听清楚,于是又重复了一遍:“给我钥匙。”那位意大利学生耸了耸肩。接着,他伸出胳膊搂住老师的脖子在双颊上亲了两下。


7、

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. 
一个人给一家他计划在假期里停留的小旅馆写了封信,“我非常希望带着我的狗,

He is well-groomed and very well behaved. 
它很干净很有教养,

Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"
你能允许它和我睡一间屋子吗?”

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "I‘ve been operating this hotel for many years.
旅馆主人立即回了封信,“我经营旅馆很多年了,

In all that time, I‘ve never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls.
狗从没偷过毛巾,床单, 餐具,或者墙上的画。

I‘ve never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly.
我也从没有在半夜因为狗喝醉胡闹而赶走它,

And I‘ve never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. 
狗也从不不付帐就跑掉。

Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. 
实际上我们非常欢迎您的狗来我们旅馆

And, if your dog will vouch for you,
如果它为您担保

you‘re welcome to stay here, too."
也欢迎您来。


8、

vacationing in hawaii, my husband and i went out to dinner one night at one of its finest restaurants - when presented with the check, my husband reached into his pocket for his wallet, but somehow lost his balance and fell over. as the people at the next table looked on in astonishment ‘he said, "the food was delicious-but wait till you get your bill!"在夏威夷度假时,一天晚上,丈夫和我去一家最好的饭店吃饭。当侍者拿来账单结账时,我丈夫把手伸进口袋掏钱包。但不知怎的,他失去了平衡,仰面摔倒了。在邻桌的人还在惊讶地望着他的时候,他说:“饭菜味道是很美----但也要等结了账再走呀。”

【注释】

(1) hawaii n.夏威夷(岛)

(2) fall over落下;跌下

(3) astonishment n.惊诧


9、

Vacationing on the island of Oahu, we were waiting in our tour bus for some stragglers to show up. A man, obviously not with our group, approached the bus and was about to board. How would our driver handle the situation, we wondered. Straight-faced, he leaned toward the door and asked, "Going to the nudist Colony, sir?"在瓦湖岛上度假时,我们坐在旅游车里等候掉队的人。一位男子,明显不是和我们一起的,朝旅游车走来并要上车。司机会怎么处理这种情况呢?我们都拭目以待。司机拉长了脸,向车门靠过去,问道:“先生,是去天体营吗?”

"Oh, no," replied the would-be passenger, retreating quickly.“哦,不,”刚想乘车的男子回答说,迅速转身而逃。

"Works every time," the driver said with a wink.“每次都管用,”司机眨巴了一下眼睛说。

【注释】

(1) be about to(do)(表计划)即将做

(2) straight-faced adj.板起面孔的

(3) nudist Colony天体营(裸体主义者实行其信条的场所)

(4) retreating quickly迅速后退。这是一个分词短语作状语,表示伴随状况。


10、

The Looney Bin
  Late one night at the insane asylum (疯人院)one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!”Another one said, "How do you know?"
  The first inmate said, "God told me!"
  Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did not!"

  疯人院
  一天晚上,在疯人院里,一个病人说:“我是拿破仑!”另一个说:“你怎么知道?”第一个人说:“上帝对我说的!”一会儿,一个声音从另一个房间传来:“我没说!”

  Notes:
  (1)Looney (俚语)疯子
  (2)inmate (n.同住者, 同室者(特指在医院、监狱))
  (3)insane asylum (疯人院)


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