I complimented one of my co-workers on having lost ten pounds. However, I couldn‘t resist bragging that when I was 17, 1 weighed 225 pounds and today I tip the scales at 224. 1 added, "That‘s not bad for a man of my age."
Overhearing this, a woman remarked, "You mean to say it took you all this time to lose one pound?"
Harry was given two apples, a small one and a large one, by his Mum. Share them with your sister, she said.
So Harry gave the small one to his little sister and started touching into the large one.
Cor! said his sister, If Mum had given them to me I‘d have given you the large one and had the small one myself.
Well, said Harry, that‘s what you‘ve got, so what are you worrying about?
A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided to cure him of the habit. One Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and hid behind a tree to intercept him on the way home.一位妇人发现丈夫回家的时候总是烂醉如泥，她决定为丈夫治好这个毛病。一个万圣节夜里，她穿上一套魔鬼戏服，躲在树后，准备在丈夫返家时拦截他的去路。
When her husband came by, she jumped out and stood before him with her red horns, long tail, and pitchfork.当丈夫走近时，她从树后跳出来，站到他面前，头上带着红色的羊角、身后有长长的尾巴，手中握着钢叉。
"Who are you?" he asked.“你是谁？”丈夫问到。
"I‘m the Devil!" she responded.“我是魔鬼！”她回答到。
"Well, come on home with me," he said, "I married your sister!"“噢，那你跟我一起回家吧，”丈夫说，“我娶了你的姐妹！”
1. cure of 是一个在各种英语阅读文章中经常出现的习语，它的意思有两大分支，一是医疗范畴上的对疾病的救治；二是生活习惯范畴上的对坏习惯的矫正。
The medicine should cure you of your cold. 这药应该能治好你的感冒。
Parents try to cure their children of bad habits. 父母们想办法纠正孩子们的坏习惯。
Boxing and Running Dan is teaching his son how to box. 丹在教他的儿子
As he does so, he left his friend, "This is a tough world, so I’m teaching my boy to fight." 他告诉他的朋友：“这是一个粗暴的世界，所以我要教我的儿子怎么去拼搏。”
Friend: "But suppose he comes up against someone much bigger than he is, who’s also been taught how to box." 朋友：“如果他碰上的对手是一个比他高大，健壮而且也会拳击的人怎么办？”
Dan: "I’m teaching him how to run, too."丹：“我也会教他怎么样赛跑呢。”